Hey, America? I'm tired.

I'm tired.

I'm tired of seeing strong, intelligent women being lam-blasted on social media when they speak out against misogyny and other forms of discrimination. That these attacks devolve so quickly into rape and death threats is shocking, and the fact that so many people shrug them off as "just words" proves how far we still have to go to treat women as equals in this country.

I'm tired of men sitting in positions of power dictating--STILL--what women can and cannot do with their reproductive health. 

I'm tired of becoming numb to the number of shootings in our country. There are approximately 200 shootings in the United States each day (including non-fatal incidents and suicides). We barely react. But 17 people are killed over a cartoon in another country, and it obsesses our nation for weeks. 

I'm tired of reading about young, unarmed black men being killed by those who are supposed to bring people to justice. White men can go on killing sprees, including killing police officers, and be brought in--living--to face their day in court. Black men (and women) don't usually have that luxury. And now, the FBI is investigating a death in Mississippi--a black man found hanging from a tree. We seem to have rewound the clock to the 1950s, and it's terrifying. As a white woman, it's terrifying. As a black person today, I can't even imagine.  

I'm tired of people assuming those receiving types government assistance are lazy, good for nothing bums who just need to get a job, when so many of those needing assistance are members of our military or people who are working two and three jobs with families and STILL can't make ends meet because minimum wage is a joke. 

I'm tired of Christians introducing hateful, discriminatory laws toward LGBTQ individuals that are beginning to hearken back to Jim Crow-like ideology. I don't care if you say it's for "religious" reasons: if you say you refuse service to someone because of who they are, and you want to post signs saying you won't serve a certain type of person, you're a bigot. The Bible was used to enforce and justify slavery and Jim Crow and the subjugation of women as well.

And, yes, I know...

#notallcops

#notallmen

#notallgunowners

#notallwhitepeople

#notallChristians

Et cetera, et cetera. 

But if even one person in a group is committing these types of discrimination and hatred, the rest of the group has a responsibility to step up and change things. 

I'm tired of a lot of other things--too many to count, really. Being tired doesn't mean stop fighting, though; it just means there's still work to be done, by all of us. Because if we truly believe in American values, we need to start acting like it. 

Rabbit Hole #10: Read Harder Challenge 2015 Update--March

Continuing through the Book Riot Read Harder Challenge 2015...

I just realized I have only nine more categories to complete! And it's only March!! What is really enlightening about this challenge is to realize I do read rather widely, and topics that I thought would be a challenge (audiobooks, for example) are much easier than I had anticipated. 

Here's my list so far:  

(The first book in each category that I've read is in blue; the second in each is in red. I'm finding that it's pretty easy to have multiple books in most of the categories. And of course, some of my books would obviously fit in more than one category, but I'm only listing them once.)

A book written by someone when they were under 25:

A book written by someone when they were over the age of 65:

A collection of short stories:

A book published by an indie press: The Salt Roads by Nalo Hopkinson (Open Roads Media Sci-Fi and Fantasy)

A book by or about someone who identifies as LGBTQ: We the Animals by Justin Torres

A book by someone of a different gender than you: Shooting Victoria: Madness, Mayhem, and the Rebirth of the British Monarchy by Paul Thomas Murphy

A book that takes place in Asia: The Lowland by Jhumpa Lahiri

A book by an author from Africa:

A book by or about someone from an indigenous culture: The Bone People by Keri Hulme

A microhistory: Desire and Disaster in New Orleans: Tourism, Race and Historical Memory by Lynnell L. Thomas

A YA novel: Paper Towns by John Green

A sci-fi novel: Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel

A romance novel:

A National Book Award, Man Booker Prize or Pulitzer from last decade:

A book that is a retelling of a classic story: Boy, Snow, Bird by Helen Oyeyemi (retelling of Snow White); The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman (The Jungle Book)

An audiobook: Voices and Poetry of Ireland (a collection)

A collection of poetry: Once by Alice Walker

A book that someone else recommended to you: Pastrix: The Cranky, Beautiful Faith of a Sinner and Saint by Nadia Bolz-Weber

A book originally published in another language:

A graphic novel, memoir or collection of comics: Captain Marvel, Vol. 1 by Kelly Sue Deconnick; Sandman, Vol. 1 by Neil Gaiman

A guilty pleasure:

A book published before 1850:

A book published this year: The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins (Jan. 2015 release date)

A self-improvement book: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo

Rabbit Hole #9: See Now Then by Jamaica Kincaid

I just finished reading Jamaica Kincaid's novella, See Now Then. Although it's only 182 pages, this book is grand in its scope.

The story is centered around Mrs. Sweet, an immigrant from the Caribbean. Her life is told through multiple perspectives--through her own thoughts, and those of Mr. Sweet and their two children, Heracles and Persephone. Throughout the story we learn of a woman's desire to be true to herself--a self that's been lost over the years as she struggled to adapt to a new country and new roles.

Kincaid's work reminds me of Virginia Woolf's later works, especially in her use of stream-of-consciousness, so if you like a linear narrative, this is not the book for you. Because it's told through memories, the Now and the Then of the title, Kincaid's characters weave their stories into one another, often overlapping narratives, sometimes repeating events, and jumping time periods. This book requires concentration, but as the strands of the family begin to fray, the tragedy of Mrs. Sweet's life comes through. Her children both love and despise her, her husband hates her with a passion, and her only sources of refuge, her tiny writing room off the kitchen and her garden, are targets for ridicule for the family. She has found her "room of one's own," but it causes as much pain as it brings relief.

As I said, this can be a challenging read, but Kincaid's character development and use of mythology make it worth the journey.

"Ch-ch-changes..."

March has been a crazy one so far. Not counting the weather that can't seem to make up its mind (it's 87 as I write this; tomorrow's high is 55), there are big changes to our life here in Nebraska.

As a lot of you already know: We're moving. To New Orleans.

Sorry, had to be done. (At least I spared you the audio!)

This has been a dream of ours for several years now, and things have finally fallen into place. Now, it's house-hunting, packing, finishing out the school year, figuring out how to transport four furbabies. . . the list goes on and on. All by the end of May. Hopefully.

 (You never realize how many books you own until you start packing. . . sigh.)

But for all the difficulties change brings, it's exciting. I am looking forward to living some place that is completely different than Nebraska, having new experiences, and cultivating a new life (going to Saints games in the Superdome!! Don't worry, Husker fans--I won't defect to the SEC!).

Ask my mom: I've had wanderlust since high school. It's time for me to take this plunge.

I hear too many people saying to me, "Oh, I wish I could do that" or  "When I'm retired. . .". The fact is that you never know what the next day is going to bring. Yes, this move is scary (I still don't have a job). Yes, we're moving halfway across the country. However, if you wait to live out your dreams, you may never have the opportunity.

"What if you hate it?" is a question people have been asking, and it's a valid one. We've been going to New Orleans for twenty years on vacation--what if living there isn't what we hoped?

We move on to another adventure.

Rabbit Hole #8: Read Harder Challenge 2015 Update--February

I'm really enjoying my journey through the 2015 Read Harder challenge by Book Riot.  As I look at my TBR pile and my to-buy lists, I think I may actually go through some of these categories more than once this year--which is exciting! 

Here's my list so far:  (ones finished in blue)

A book written by someone when they were under 25:

A book written by someone when they were over the age of 65:

A collection of short stories:

A book published by an indie press:

A book by or about someone who identifies as LGBTQ:

A book by someone of a different gender than you: Shooting Victoria: Madness, Mayhem, and the Rebirth of the British Monarchy by Paul Thomas Murphy

A book that takes place in Asia: The Lowland by Jhumpa Lahiri

A book by an author from Africa:

A book by or about someone from an indigenous culture: The Bone People by Keri Hulme

A microhistory: Desire and Disaster in New Orleans: Tourism, Race and Historical Memory by Lynnell L. Thomas

A YA novel: Paper Towns by John Green

A sci-fi novel: Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel

A romance novel:

A National Book Award, Man Booker Prize or Pulitzer from last decade:

A book that is a retelling of a classic story: Boy, Snow, Bird by Helen Oyeyemi (retelling of Snow White)

An audiobook:

A collection of poetry: Once by Alice Walker

A book that someone else recommended to you: Pastrix: The Cranky, Beautiful Faith of a Sinner and Saint by Nadia Bolz-Weber

A book originally published in another language:

A graphic novel, memoir or collection of comics: Captain Marvel, Vol. 1 by Kelly Sue Deconnick

A guilty pleasure:

A book published before 1850:

A book published this year:

A self-improvement book:

My Difficult Relationship with Virginia Woolf

I love Virginia Woolf. I've spent a lot of time with her: I've read almost everything she's written, and she was the topic of my master's thesis. I admire her style, her honesty, her rejection of tradition--both in writing and her personal life.

But should she be held up as the epitome of feminism? Of feminist authors? The Huffington Post's Maddie Crum recently wrote an article titled Why Virginia Woolf Should Be Your Feminist Role Model", giving several reasons why Woolf should hold that title. And while I do agree with a lot of what she says (although mentioning fluid gender roles without mentioning Orlando seems rather short-sighted), I also have some serious reservations.

For all of her wonderful, progressive points, Woolf was very much a product of her time. As adamant as she was that women needed space and money to pursue their creative lives, she really was only speaking of a certain economic class of women. White women. And Christian. Woolf, unfortunately, expressed very classist, racist, and anti-Semitic views while also advocating for women's autonomy and creative freedom.

These are difficult contradictions to reconcile, especially when women of color and women in lower economic situations have felt ostracized by mainstream feminism. It hasn't always been inclusive; it isn't always inclusive today. If we truly believe that feminism is equality, it has to mean equality in all realms. It has to also include income equality, education, reproductive justice, racial and LGBTQ rights. Feminism can, and should, be something everyone is proud of and works toward, not something that continues to make certain segments of society feel ostracized.

If we just look at Virginia Woolf as an advocate for advancing women's positions in life and giving them opportunities to express themselves creatively, then I think, yes, she is a good role model. Alice Walker (who is one of my favorite authors) references Woolf in her essay, In Search of Our Mothers' Gardens. In that essay, Walker mentions that for far too long women, especially women of color, had to find subversive ways to express themselves--in quilts, flower gardens and the walls of their homes. They were as anonymous as Woolf's Shakespearean sister, doomed to a life of obscurity because of their gender and race. It is our duty to resurrect those lives as best we can, as Woolf did for the fictional sister of Shakespeare and Walker did for Zora Neale Hurston, to more fully embrace our heritage.

Perhaps we don't have to expect everything from our role models. No one is perfect. We all make mistakes, try to learn from them, and move on. Roxane Gay would call that being a "bad feminist." No one is a perfect feminist--most days we can't even completely agree on what that means. We attempt to live our lives as best we can, but we're going to fail. Because at the end of the day, we're all human.

I'd like to think that if Woolf lived today, she would be more open to helping her sisters of all stripes. Even so, for all of her faults, she does have important words for us all as we strive toward a more equal world for all women.

Rabbit Hole #7: New Harper Lee novel and Whistling Vivaldi

Um, biggest news right now in the book world? Harper Lee has a new book coming out. Not only that, but the much-loved, seldom-seen writer's second novel is a sequel of sorts to To Kill a Mockingbird. When this news was announced on Tuesday, my Twitter feed pretty much looked like this:

gif courtesy of mashable.com

It's not every day a reclusive writer comes out with a new work, and even rarer that it's a sequel to one of the most beloved books of all time. (To be fair, she did write this work before Mockingbird, but it's still a sequel!)

This news isn't without controversy, however. There are people who are genuinely worried that Lee was tricked into publishing this book, given her declining health. There are others who are worried it won't live up to Mockingbird. As far as the first concern goes, I, for one, desperately hope the reports that Lee is happy about publishing Go, Set a Watchman are true. The thought that someone would exploit her for financial gain makes my stomach churn. The second concern also has merits: rarely to do sequels live up to the original work.

Hopefully, we'll have some clearer answers on the first concern soon. We'll have to wait until summer to answer that second question: Go, Set a Watchman comes out July 14.



In other news, I just finished Claude M. Steele's Whistling Vivaldi: How Stereotypes Affect Us and What We Can Do. I don't normally read sociology books, unless they deal with women's issues, but this particular book was fascinating. Steele's claim is that stereotypes can affect us, even if we are not consciously aware of being stereotyped. Because our culture labels and groups everyone, we all have contingencies that are in the back of our minds and acting on our lives every day. Women are not smart at math and science, blacks aren't as intelligent as whites, whites aren't as athletic, men aren't sensitive--all of these contingencies can not only affect the interactions we have with each other, but our own performance in areas as well.

Whistling Vivaldi did bog down for me when Steele was describing the scientific methods he and his team used, but the examples/experiments he discusses as well as the implications for our society were intriguing. And as a teacher, trying minimizing the stereotype threats in my classroom as much as possible to help my students achieve is definitely something I will be focusing on. Well worth the read!